Update on last month's Jody post.

Tl;dr took a vacation, lawyered up; divorce options unfavorable, will proceed nonetheless.

A month has passed since my Jody post, so here's a quick update on how things are going.

1. Family life had been... well, you guess. We've had several open discussions of the situation, and decided divorce would be the only feasible option. Later, however, my wife told me she felt "confused" about "everything", and wouldn't see the guy for the time being so that she could figure things out. She then proposed that we could separate for a while to see if being apart worked. Still, to this day I have not heard her apologize for what she did.

2. Meanwhile, my annual vacation time came, so I said "we shall see" and left. My son is with my parents now reeeeally far away from where we live so that's where I went (I said "kids" earlier simply because details didn't seem to matter back then - I was just too depressed and bitter at the time). Turned out to be a good decision - I've spent quality time with the little guy and overall enjoyed the break I needed.

3. Following all the good advice given in the previois post, I lawyered up. And after talking to not one but two lawyers, divorce options do not look good for me:

-Child custody: my country's legal system does not favor fathers at all, hence chances of getting child custody are somewhere in the 3-5 percent range;

-Property: we own some real estate, and she gets half of title (I believe I put it right in legalese). Since I don't see us living together in the same place I will obviously have to move out and rent something. Living on base is not an option. Oh, and to make it even more interesting, there's mortgage involved, so figuring out debt allocation is gonna be fun. Exciting shit.

-Child support: quarter of my pay. I don't mind paying, however how can I be sure all that money is spent on my kid? Pisses me off man.

-Car: yeah, she wants to keep the car because why the fuck not?

-Common future and plans: after 13 years she suddenly tells me she is not happy with my planned career path, is tired of moving around and switching jobs (and we've only moved once, and to a way better location!). Suddenly my career-building is a problem for the family. Surprise surprise.

Nonetheless, I feel so much better after I've made a decision to part ways. I have my objective zeroed in, so to speak, and need to pursue it with as little drama as possible. Still, I am told divorce is nasty business and it will not be fun.

Thanks for the support guys, and don't be like me - spend more time with your families, take your significant other on trips, do all the fun stuff with the kids.

PS I'm so happy I didn't follow the impulse to go after the guy. Wouldn't have ended well either way.
PPS Will neither confirm nor deny country of origin. Not US though.

Edit: formatting (sigh)