So, inspired by the warmth of the discourse under the mod's recent positive and encouraging post about welcoming civvies to the subreddit, I decided to stop being a Debbie Downer and post something heartwarming for once (no one likes a Debbie Downer, mmkay?).

So, to set up the background; my fiancee and I were in a long distance relationship (that actually worked out! We had some great examples around of what not to do, and took notes), with my wife-to-be living back at our mutual hometown with her family and our mutual friends.

As regularly as we could, she'd come down for a week or long weekend, or I'd go up. Have some alone time, hang out with friends, visit special places, whatever.

So, knowing she's coming down for an upcoming weekend, sometime after my first deployment, the guys insist we come to a division (roughly 50 people) house party, at a guy's house out in town. I didn't want to blow the whole night, and she wasn't comfortable driving my manual transmission truck, so I had to keep my stuff together, but we would make an appearance.

So, we get there, and I'm immediately offered a drink. I stipulate that I'm driving, and they assure me that's fine, but I need to join them for at least a round; then they won't bug me. So, having been there for less than 60 seconds, I chug down a pint of Guinness with a shot glass dropped in, which contained a half shot of Bailey's and a half shot of Jameson's (for those not familiar with this drink, you have to chug it in a heartbeat, or the Bailey's curdles and gets chunky. Also, the name is considered offensive in most pubs, so don't ask for it at a bar). True to their word, no further drinks were pushed on me, although it was noted to me (loudly) that I was out of my league, and should count myself lucky (I do, trust me. And people, seriously, at least try to marry out of your league; not being an asshole and having a good sense of humor counts for more than you may realize).

For the next couple hours, she observes the typical behavior of the group with the objective gaze of a medical professional evaluating a situation. Two gentlemen, three sheets to the wind, begin chasing each other around the house, which ends when a 6' guy named Sue (not really, but close) tries to vault the couch, knocks it over, and careens off the wall; he comes up laughing and takes a shot. Two other gentlemen, one of South American descent and one of Southeast Asian descent, are hurling increasingly vulgar racial slurs and racist jokes at each other (depicting each other as Mexican and Chinese respectively, which neither were)(I'm not sure if they really did hate each other). More beer was consumed via funnel than either Solo cup or can, and a truly heroic quantity of liquor, pizza, and water were consumed (not being fools, they kept up on their pizza and water; you know, "drinking responsibly").

So, after 2 hours since my dropshot (gotta do the beer math, people), and some pizza and water, we hit the road. On the way back to my place, my fiancee's oddly quiet; so I ask her what she's thinking about. She takes a deep breath, thinks for a second, laughs, and just says "That explains soooo much!"

Edit: For the life of me, I didn't know what she meant.